martin luther king, jr.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." -- Martin Luther King, Jr.

For me, the struggle is about letting in the light and love. I think that takes more courage and strength than most of us realize. Light and love are born of vulnerability and risk.

At one time, love and light may have been the default - I don't really know. I do know, however, that fear was the default emotion during the Civil Rights Movement and shame was a weapon of choice. Unfortunately, this remains true today. 

My hope is that we find a way to move through the fear and put down the shame so that we can open the door to love and light. In ourselves, our families, our communities and schools, our workplaces, and our world.

It's a great day to practice being the light and love. And while it seems small, I think it's important to start at home and with our neighbors. King's challenge was more difficult than we think.

Comments

[heather]

I love the words that play in the intro on the King Center website for this very reason. Grace and love and light is just the place to start. Yes it is important to know more, to study the history and the details, but beginning in simplicity is equally powerful.

[tom]

What role does Jesus play in your life? You give a lot of answers about what our lives should potentially look like, but my question is, what is the methodology to get us on track? Does Jesus have anything to do with your practical methodology? thanks

[carol]

thank you for this reminder.

[Angela DiGiovanni | life *iphoneography * art]

One of my favorite Martin Luther King Jr. quotes is:

"A man who won't die for something is not fit to live."

Certainly makes me think...

[Pamela Picard]

I have felt for a very long time that fear is the default. From the first moment that human became self aware, they felt vulnerable - naked and insignificant in the face of the unknowable, uncontrollable and unforeseeable. Everything since has been self defense. Shelter. Clothing. Civilization.

Shame is a yardstick someone else has imposed. Community. Church. Culture. We buy into an outer ideal, measuring ourselves and others against it. Shame fills the gap in between who we are and who we wish we could be.

A man like Martin Luther King or a woman like Rosa Parks - they were not paragons. They were not flawless. They were human which is to be vulnerable and to know fear. I don't doubt that they had plenty of foibles that burned just as hot for them as our faults and failings do for us.

The difference is that they dared to be greater than their personal vulnerability, fear or shame. In that daring, they lifted their sights and became a shining light for us all.

[jessica]

I've been thinking lately about why it's so hard to confront darkness and hate with love and light. And I wonder if it has to do not just with vulnerability, but with the simple idea that like feeds like. I struggle with this in my own life--angry energy from outside of me fosters angry energy inside of me. If I was lazy yesterday, I'm more likely to be lazy today. With something as large as cultural prejudice and social injustice, the tides are that much harder to turn. It takes discipline and perspective to make it happen. So simple, but so not easy.

[debbie]

I just spent the better part of an hour attempting to write a very similar post about allowing love and light to lead me. When I feel hurt or fearful, love and light seem to be in short supply. This morning, I saw a smattering on MLK quotes on my facebook news feed and it gave me pause. Who does it benefit to live shut off from love and light? Certainly not me. What am I getting from it really? Not much. I don't get any closer to feeling better. And I certainly don't add joy or light to anyone else's life when I am shut off. So who is it helping? No one. It's just habit. And the hard part is seeing what I am doing when I'm doing it so I can gently shift myself to a more loving and open place. Thank you for writing the blog post I couldnt seem to pull together. And thank you MLK for the wise and profound words that continue to inspire ...

[Elizabeth Harper]

Funny ... you and I were thinking and writing a good bit alike today. Although my day here in the UK is almost at an end it's good to see your words before bed.

When I wrote my post this morning I was thinking that with all that is going on in the world now we could stand to have more folks lead with their heart.

I appreciate your post on this day especially.

[Kathy]

Thank you. I am so glad to have come across your work.

[Bridget]

My kid was just telling me how hard it is for him to drink in a compliment. It's so hard. It's so hard maybe because compliments tend to come with commitments, and if we commit to something or someone, it's scary because they can hurt us.
It feels like the universe is perpetually flicking our light on, dark/light/dark/light/dark, everything related, integrated, connected.
I love it, Brene, that you find a way to piece it apart for us.

[sbLyngo]

A lovely post and reminder to inhale light and exhale love. Today is one of those days I really miss America. May we all strive to be heros for one another. Give thanks for the works of the king and all of the ways our lives are better for his doings, being love. More love, light and laughter. More Life.

[Sarah]

It's just my point of view..take it, leave it, whatever..and I perceive that we ARE light. We talk about letting light in or becoming light and love. We ARE light and love. We cannot, therefore, become it. I cannot become a woman..I AM a woman. I cannot become a person..I AM a person. I cannot become light..I AM light. All that is maybe required is to stop attempting to snuff out my light or to hide my light...and the light is here because I am here and I am that light. The love is here because I am here and I am that love.

Again, just my point of view. Thanks for a great post!

[Anna Guest-Jelley]

What a lovely reminder; thanks for sharing! I was thinking about another MLK quote today on a similar note:" We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope."

[Marianne]

A beautiful post, Brene. Here's another perspective on the point Sarah made - when in deep meditation or yoga I experience my true nature to be pure love and I perceive the true nature of others to also be pure love. So as I understand it my work is to let down the barriers I've erected through fear and shame in order to both allow my own love to reach out and touch others and to allow the love of others to reach in and connect with mine. It's about true connection and that is deeply vulnerable work. But if I am called to be a peacemaker in the world, it's where all my work must begin and end. With myself, with my boyfriend, my parents, my neighbours.

[Lynne]

Echoing Marianne's post...it reminded me of a Rumi quote that inspires me:

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

We are the love and the light...the magic happens when we allow our selves to be vulnerable enough to show it.

[Neri]

My courageous response is.....

The light and love is God. MLK Jr. points to our Creator....to light .....to Love. We are called to transform ourselves....Jesus said, "Be not afraid." So yes, your message, MLK Jr. message rings true.

[soraya nulliah]

Brene-thank you so much for the gentle reminder...it all starts with us...our hearts. Dr. King LIVED that and what better way to honor him and his legacy than to practice that in our everyday lives? Really...what better way to honor ourSELVES?...our loved ones...our community?

[Erika Cleveland]

I wrote a response to this post on my blog. Thanks. And thanks for your books and your interview with Jen Louden at the Comfort Cafe which is where I found you. I am connecting deeply to everything you say and learning so much. I am eager to pass it on.

Martin Luther King is a good example of someone who embodied the strengths and courage that you talk about. So fitting.

love,
Erika

[jan]

Yes it starts with practice. For me it's about keeping ourselves in the light and going gently. Thank you for the reminder today. Off to check out the MLK centre site now.

[Kristen]

Thank you for the reminder about what's at stake when we operate from a place of fear. It's a sad reality and we must continue to challenge ourselves to have the courage to choose light and love over fear.

[tom]

I want to reply to Neri's comment. You are absolutely right. We can try to be love and light all we want, but the source is God. Only when we see Jesus loving us and dying for us and renewing us everyday, do we have the strength to be bright lights and constant unconditional love, bringing glory to Him.

[Joe McCarthy]

One of the many things about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., that continues to inspire me is the way he modeled nonviolent communication. In the recent aftermath of the attempted assassination of another political figure (Gabrielle Giffords), and all the accusations flying around on both sides, I think it is especially important to remember that when we use violent communication to confront our opponents - however much we may believe they "deserve" it - we are stooping to their level. This quote from MLK reminds us that It is only through light and love that we can hope to overcome darkness and hatred.

If you'll forgive the invocation of yet another inspiring quote from yet another inspiring figure, I'm reminded of Marianne Williamson's famous passage from A Return to Love: Reflections on a Course in Miracles, that I think is relevant here:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

[Amy]

I agree wholeheartedly with this. Rule number one in our house is "Be Kind." We all have to be reminded of it from time to time. I tell my boys over and over again that the only way to get the resolutions they are seeking is to not react with anger and not to retaliate when they feel slighted. It is so hard but so necessary.

[Carla]

I just found you via another blog that I read and was wondering if you have done any work with infertility and the shame and other emotional pitfalls that brings up?

[Moe]

Hi Brene.
I've lurked for a bit and am coming out of the shadows.
Very inspiring post today.
The work of love and light is right in front of us -- with ourselves. But I love
that you mention neighbors. They can annoy the crap out of me sometimes!
I send them love and light from my heart.
Thanks, Brene.
- Moe

[Stephanie]

Universe must be speaking to me.... came to your blog right after I read damomma.com and this was a paragraph in her recent post.... "I do know the formula for damage — it’s thinking you know better for someone else than they know for themselves. It’s thinking that perfection is achievable and you are closer to it than the next person and you are just dying to tell her so."

thank you.

[rebecca @ altared spaces]

What a wonderful message. I especially love your exhortation that doing these little things at home and in our neighborhood is the profound place.

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